Daily Boundaries

healthy living Jun 13, 2023

As many of you know, I used to be a Franciscan friar.

The friar’s life is one marked by living in vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience, revolving around a schedule of work, play, and prayer. I happened to live this radically different lifestyle in the same city I had my first job as a “normal” married man. (Well, normal enough at least to no longer sport a shaved head, long beard, and gray monk-looking outfit).

There are some pretty obvious differences between the two...

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Walking With the Wounded Soul

God designed our humanity in such a way that even from the very first moment of our existence, we are dependent upon other people to survive.

As humans made in the image of a trinitarian God who is a communion of persons, we aren’t meant to go through life alone. We’re made for communion - with God and with others. Or to put it simply, we are made out of relationship and for relationship. 

However (as I’m sure you’ve noticed) we live in a fallen world. And that...

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What is Mental Health? (Q&A with Dr. Greg)

- The following is an excerpt edited from a live presentation and Q&A with Dr. Greg Bottaro. 

Q. We hear about mental illness all the time. But how do we arrive at mental health? Can you give a working concept of what that looks like?

A. It could be helpful to start with health in general. What could we point to as an indicator of health that overlaps any dimension of our human experience, whether physical, spiritual, or emotional/mental? 

The presence of adaptability or...

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Culture Wars and the Challenge to Listen With Curiosity

Excerpt from Being Human Podcast Episode #123: Fake Science and Real Compassion

Although I don’t watch TV often, I recently had some downtime (which also doesn't happen very often!) and decided I wanted to veg out a bit. While perusing through the streaming channels for documentaries, I thought it might be interesting to find a show that would teach me how “the other side” thinks. 

I landed on a talk show hosted by Jon Stewart (who I think it’s safe to say...

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God’s Vision of You: Perfectionism vs. Self-Compassion

Written by Sean Faulkner, IDDM Training Director

Think for a minute about what you are striving for in life. What is it that drives you to work really hard? What’s the narrative that runs through your mind when feeling this drive to accomplish things?

Many of us are trapped in a false narrative, trying desperately to earn what we can’t, despite the reality that we don’t actually have to. Why? Because - unbeknownst to us - we already have it. 

What the heck am I talking...

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You're No Angel, But Neither Am I

Let nothing disturb you. 
Let nothing frighten you. 
All things are passing away. 
God never changes. 
Patience obtains all things. 
Whoever has God lacks nothing. 
God alone suffices.

This short prayer/poem by St. Teresa of Avila hits the nail on the head as she reveals the reality of God's providence and pervasive presence in our lives. In it, she encourages us to recognize that no matter what, all truly will be well and that all we truly need is God - the only One...

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Make Stress Your New Best Friend

From a presentation given by IDDM Mentor, Ryan Nash.

My first job fresh out of graduate school was as a mental health counselor in a prison.

My days were spent listening to the inmates talk about their intense levels of trauma, both in regards to the crimes they had committed but also the equal or worse crimes and traumas they had suffered themselves.

Not only was the prison understaffed, but there was also an awful amount of paperwork that went along with the job. To make matters worse, the...

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Jumping Into "Fix-It" Mode: On Empathy and the Male Brain

Uncategorized Nov 16, 2022

Written by Dr. Bryan Violette, CatholicPsych Chief of Staff and IDDM Training Director.  

Throughout my work as a psychologist (and now Mentor), I’ve had a lot of experience exploring relational patterns, especially some of the common dynamics between men and women. 

The almost universal complaint about men from the perspective of women is that men try to "fix" their feelings when all they really want is to feel understood. There’s a very funny portrayal of...

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WWJF: What Would Jesus Feel? (And Why It Matters For Us)

anxiety faith Jul 15, 2022

 

Have you ever read a passage from the Gospel and asked yourself, "I wonder what Jesus was feeling in this passage? What emotions was he experiencing here?"

(I would be willing to bet it isn’t all that often.)

For some reason, it’s easy to forget that Jesus actually felt things as we tend to gloss over the real experience of Jesus. 

In his humanity, he knew what it was to feel sadness, joy, and amusement … the sting of rejection, anger, apprehension…

To...

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A Catholic Approach to Dealing With Difficult Relationships

 

Why is this relationship so draining? Do I just need to cut this person out of my life completely? 

I can't handle my [parent/child/boss/etc.] anymore! Every conversation we have ends in an argument! Should I stop communicating with them for good?

I get questions like this all the time from clients and friends alike. The questions aren't about just one kind of relationship either. From friendships to dating to parent/child relationships, the question of healthy boundaries pertains...

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